Is January a Depressing Month?

Posted on: Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Dear Amy,

I feel like I haven't really talked to you in such a long time! How are you? Are you enjoying January? I've heard that January is the most depressing month of the year… I suppose I could understand, with the holidays ending and the dreary winter days just beginning. I've always loved January though, with my birthday at the very end, and now with Harry's birthday on the 9th, I especially love January.

The day he left. Harry looks so little here.
I've been busy. I'm expecting a great, big homecoming next week. One I've been waiting almost five months for. (Side note, I realized the other day that I find myself shrugging the time off like it's really not a big deal when I talk to people who have dealt with deployments before. Why??? It is a freaking big deal. Five months is a long time to go without your best friend/partner/spouse. It doesn't matter if someone else deployed for six months, nine months, 12 months. Any deployment is hard and is a long time.) Anyway, busy. For two reasons: I'm getting ready for Jon to be home. Cleaning, organizing, playing with my kid all the while. And I'm finding tasks to keep myself busy. Because, as you know, I'd go crazy if I weren't busy.

I'm curious about your reunions with Aaron after deployments. Were they strange? Obviously they were exhilarating and unbelievably special. But once the excitement was brought under control… was it weird to have him home? I think it's going to be a little strange - in the best way possible. Not strange or weird in a bad way. It's just been five months of an entirely new routine and way of life. I'm used to doing it all on my own so it'll be interesting to see how quickly I'm able to relinquish some of the responsibilities. I hope this isn't coming off bad. I'm ridiculously excited and it's going to be the best weird of my life. Just weird. At least for a few days/weeks.

I have so many thoughts about deployments and this deployment in general. Their affect on the families, on the servicemen and women, on our pets. But this really isn't the time for that. I'm sure you understand I need to be much further removed before I'm ready to talk too openly about that.

That's my dad. And the cabin.
As for the cabin, my dad and stepmom did A LOT of it, but they did not build it. They bought the existing structure and land from a very tall man in Montana who now lives down the street and wants nothing more in life than to be a grandfather. His name is Bob and he built the cabin. When my dad purchased it, the main floor had a bathroom, a bedroom, and a living room/kitchen great room. It also had a basement that was a big, giant garage. They turned that big, giant garage into a much smaller garage and a bedroom, another (beautiful) bathroom, a great room, a mudroom, and two sleeping lofts. All in all, they added a queen bed, four twins, one full, a crib, and a spot to add another full sized bed. And it's beautiful.

I left Montana feeling excited, refreshed and a little sad. I didn't want to leave the cabin or the mountains or the snow or the thin, cold air. But most importantly, I wasn't ready to leave my family. I completely understand your sense of longing. I think it was especially strong this time for two reasons: 1) I was coming home to an empty house with no husband for a few more weeks and 2) there is just something about having a baby that makes you want that baby to be around family.

So yes, Christmas was wonderful, Montana was great, and I was not ready to leave. And my New Year's Eve? I actually thought to myself "I can stay up as late as I want to! I don't have to work tomorrow! I can watch a movie!" So I started a movie, and turned it off at 10. I slept through the ball dropping. But it was kind of nice. Just another night. And I got lots of rest, which I never complain about. Your NYE sounds imperfectly perfect. I guess that's just part of growing up, huh?

Your grown up friend,


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