KIN

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My Computer Died. Ugh.

Posted on: Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Dear Amy,

First of all, how is the move going? Isn't it the weirdest sensation to watch people you've never met pack up all of your worldly possessions? It always weirds me out a bit, especially when one of the packers is telling us all about his felony. Yep. Those are the people packing up my grandma's Christmas plates.



My hard drive crashed. So these pictures (totally post-unrelated) are what you get today.
Don't worry about next week. I'd sure love a picture or two (and I'm sure our readers would too) to keep up with your adventures. You're right - I love nature and camping and hiking and all of that good stuff, and I'll be living vicariously through you as temperatures reach into the 90's here. Yuck. Didn't anyone tell Mississippi it's September? I better send a memo.

But. Oh my goodness. Can we just talk about the fact that I have the hardest times in the whole wide world forgiving myself. If I do something which in turn causes remorse, 100% of the time I am beating myself up over it for months longer than the person I did wrong to. Most of the time people don't even realize I'm so upset over upsetting them, since it was such a small thing. How do you learn to forgive yourself?

I guess that is just our clean conscious blabbing in our ears, wanting it's record to stay nice and squeaky. I suppose I'd rather let remorse eat me up inside like that than not feel sorry at all. So thanks Jiminy.

Have you learned the secret to forgiving yourself? If so, please share. There are certain things I just can't get past. The other day I snapped at Jon instead of my sewing machine (who really deserved it). I felt terrible for days. I still haven't forgiven myself for not having my dad walk me down the aisle at my wedding (as I alluded to before).

Oh, and I'd love to travel to the future to the end of this deployment. But really, I would hate to miss the in between. Seeing Harry growing every day (holy cow that kid is growing. He's crawling and getting into everything. I love it). As much as I hate the distance and the separation, the reunion is going to be so so sweet. Because of the in between. So maybe I wouldn't want to go somewhere in the future. I really like The Now. Would you?

Keep Calm and Pack On,
Mallory

2 comments:

  1. that was a really lovely post.
    and OMG those two little front teeth are the cutest!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thnk you Hena! Also, I feel like I can write a sonnet about those little teeth... I love them so. XO Mallory

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